Started for National Poetry Writing Month 2011, decided to keep things going. I've always liked writing poetry.
Interesting you wrote this from the man's point of view. I had to double check your profile. How would you have put it the other way round? Emotive piece.
In fact, the narrator could be male or female. Many lesbian couples choose to get a sperm donor instead of adoption.But, the reason I wrote it from that point of view is because that's the way the story formed in my head. I try not to argue with my muse. She's not very helpful when she's angry with me. :)
omg, this poem is captured my heart, sohonestly written.
Very blunt and hard-hitting! Less is more, as is often the case.
You captured the angst, sadness, frustration in this tight little write. Well done.http://www.kimnelsonwrites.com/2011/08/19/failed-migration/
the driving home on auto-pilot is very vivid. i like how it's written.
Awwwww a sad but all too true read. Great use of the prompt words. :)
sometimes people forget that the father is hurting too, This is a very sad piece.
Kim - thank you.Jenni - Vivid is good for connecting with it. I'm glad you enjoyed the writing.Daydreamertoo - thanks.Sheilagh - You're right. It's an event involving both parents.
Paige - thank you.Li - Fewer words sometimes allows more imagination and personal connection.
Brilliantly written, someone's whole world in a few short sentences, so well done.I was sure I'd commented earlier? my computer keeps freezing so I'm glad I came back :o)